The rules have changed and I don't know the new rules. The truth of the matter is that Superman is gone from our home for almost a year. During that year, our lives at home will go on. We'll have things scheduled, things planned, schedules to keep...all the things that go into a normal family life. When Superman has the opportunity to Skype, however, we want to be there to talk to him. There is the rub. I don't know how to handle it when Superman Skypes through when we have guests in our home. Our guests deserve my attention. After all, I've invited them into our home. Superman deserves my attention, too, and he's my husband...I want to talk with him. Truthfully, though, I feel torn at the moment.
Am I supposed to expect my guests to just wait while I chat with Superman for half an hour? Am I supposed to expect Superman to understand when I am telling him, my husband, that I am too busy to chat online? What are the rules? This is actually one of the most challenging things I'm dealing with these days. Does anyone have an answer? A suggestion? What am I supposed to do in these awkward moments?
And what about bedtime when the kids have been super tired? Or when I'm just running out the door? I can't just ignore the call - it is my husband. Am I allowed to not have time right then? Is anything more important than my husband's call?
I know this might seem silly, but there are no rules for situations like this in a modern technology-assisted marriage.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
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1 comment:
This one has troubled me from the other side as well. If I am not trying to get in touch with you every time I have an internet connection; does that make me a less loving husband and father? I know that you guys love me and miss me dearly, so dropping everything you are doing or kicking people out of the house is not what I want you to do when I call. Twenty years ago when you wanted to call home from overseas you had to go to a place on post where you could have them set up a call for you. Because it was so hard to accomplish, people would drop everything to talk. Technically, we can talk whenever we want. I have a cell phone and a laptop. Even if the internet is down you can get a hold of me.
So maybe the question to look at is the purpose of these calls. Would writing more e-mails accomplish the same thing? Would having several predefined days and times during the week be a better solution?
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